Tale of the Twins - Part 1

I've been wanting to write this for a while now... just couldn't figure out how to put it.

So I figured I'd just give it to ya straight.

For all of April, and most of May, I saw one of 3 doctors every week, and even got a mammogram. I had chronic hives that would NOT go away, leaving me to scratch my skin raw, without even realizing it until I drew blood.

I was so embarrassed, I hardly left the house.

My mammography technician was as sweet as pie, and during the hour-and-a-half process, I learned that these usually take about 15 minutes.

So what the hell happened with me?

They were looking for cancer.


It happened on a Monday. I was in the shower, and noticed I had a bump on the left breast. Not inside, mind you.

It was on the outside, on my areola. About the size of a nickel. WTF?

I got a closer look at it, and blinked my eyes - wondering if I was seeing things???

It had a strange layer of film over it, that was peeling. And FUCK. It was tender to the touch. And it itched like hell.

But this was just the beginning. I checked the right breast, and whoa - there's another one there. Same spot, just under the nipple.

Not as big (about the size of a dime), but in the same general area.

Still in the shower, I'm trying not to wig out. I wash and scrub, and wash my hands over and over again - afraid it might be some type of contagious rash and not wanting it anywhere else on my body.

I try to be as normal as possible. I get Joel settled and grab my laptop out of the office. We plump down on the sofa and while he's hollering answers at Noggin', I'm answering emails.

I'm trying not to think about it. I'm wondering what the hell could it be - and soon switch to the home laptop.

Now try googling "breast rash nipple areola" and see what you get.

See if you don't start to see the words "cancer" and "paget's" and "misdiagnosis."

I was freaking myself out. I started to think, "What if?" and began to imagine my boys growing up without their mother...

I had to pull myself away from it all, and offer up my prayers. And did my darndest to let it go.

"His shoulders can carry more than ours, right?"

And then I waited.

[To be continued...]


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